holy crap.

every now and then i wish i could yell at certain people what i really think about them.


"stop texting me at 2am. i'm asleep dammit. i don't want you that way. have you noticed i haven't responded to anything? god."

oh hey. finals.

great.

i'm deleting this post.
it makes me mad.

Concerning my resolutions:

1. Keep smiling// somewhat fail
2. Go running at least twice a week// doing okay
3. Go out to manhattan one night a week and spend no more than 10$// a necessity
4. Keep the same hair color for as long as possible =p// getting there!
5. Produce the best work possible.// not much opportunity
6. Learn martial arts// not yet!
7. Don't spend as much time on campus as usual.// definitely keeping up with this one

1. everytime people see me, they say I look so serious. That's just my blank face.
2. I was doing this actually 3-4 times a week until I got sick, now I'm at once a week =[
3. I'm interning in Manhattan, so keeping it cheap is a necessity.
4. My hair's been dark brownish-black for a little over a month now! Success!
5. I haven't gotten many big assignments
6. No time!
7. When I am home, I'm relaxing. Life is too busy!

----

So much is going on these days! But Halloween provides an opportunity to let go a little. =]

Resolutions

A new semester is vastly approaching. I'm about to move into a new place. I want to bring good energy and positivity into my new place of living, and I want to start the new school year on a positive note.

I saw a wonderful frosted mini wheats commercial today, in which the little animated cereal guys were counting down as if it were a New Year's celebration rather than back to school. They were talking about resolutions. I think that's adorable!

My new semester resolutions:

1. Keep smiling
2. Go running at least twice a week
3. Go out to manhattan one night a week and spend no more than 10$
4. Keep the same hair color for as long as possible =p
5. Produce the best work possible.
6. Learn martial arts
7. Don't spend as much time on campus as usual.

I feel like these are all very necessary changes/enhancements to my life right now.

I bought paint for my new place, its a medium oatmeal color called "Wooden Peg".
ALSO just bought a pair of boots from yesstyle.com, on sale! AND I had a coupon code...AND no taxes were charged!!! LIFE IS GOOD <3

my room WILL match these. =]

makes me wish i were a different major

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/health/salad-spinner-centrifuge-a-cheap-ingenious-health-care-tool-2019637/

the girls in this article have done something incredible. if you find yourself randomly on my blog, take a second to read what i've linked to.

Lila Kerr and Lauren Theis , students at Rice University, have developed an invaluable tool for the world of health care. Using a simple salad spinner that most of us may have in our own kitchens, they've created a tool that utilizes centrifugal force to separate red blood cells and plasma from blood samples in about 20 minutes.

The invention requires no electricity and is relatively cheap to manufacture. It can process 30 blood samples at a time.

This device is especially essential to testing for anemia in patients of the third world. Anemia is one of the first diseases most doctors look for when diagnosing heavy medical issues within a patient. I get a full blood scan basically every six months, and anemia is always on the list.

Anemia often appears along with other more serious conditions such as HIV/AIDS, or other autoimmune disorders. Anemia results in lack of oxygen to vital organs and can do more damage when occurring next to other conditions. SO yes. I've also noticed that anemia is quite common among female patients...

imagine the impact this new device can have for the less fortunate peoples? Instead of having to send out blood samples to far away locations and losing valuable diagnosis time, the tests can be performed quickly, and in almost any situation.

I don't know about the rest of the random people that may read this, but I'm excited.

Also excited that the girls (GIRLS!) who invented this were my age when they built it.

labios compartidos

i've noticed that i don't like the way things are going around here.
i'm so back and forth on what i want that i'm not even sure i should be thinking about anything these days.

15 more days of working summer job number 2
26 days until 2nd year RA training
46 days until orientation at MTV internship
47 days until first day of my third year at college. @.@
I'm guessing I'll need to quit my office job or else I'll work myself to death once school starts.

how many days until I just don't care about you anymore. UGHHHHHHHH I would be fine if my subconscious didn't throw so many dreams at me. I was fine and looking into other options until last night threw me for a loop. I wake up thinking that that actually happened and then I realize that I'm here by myself.

Why does this keep happening? Why can't I just get out of bed and get over you? I don't understand.

I was discarded like a piece of trash, without a second thought. I've been placated, appeased, and lead on only to realize that its not worth the pain and stress I go through to hold on to you. Why did I believe your lies? You didn't have to lie to me at all. What you promised me was not what I was after in the beginning. So why am I sitting here, wondering about what you really wanted, when its been two months since we kissed for the last time? Why am I going on and on like some stupid emotional idiot. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.

SUNNY PERIODS.

Daily Forecast from Ashley Fontones on Vimeo.

So um. This was done for an excersize in my flash animation class. "Things to do or make in Jail."

Getting away from the World

A popular thing for me to do it seems is "run away". Maybe its because how I was raised, packing up and moving away every time things got rough. Never fighting to get things right. Always a new start.

I'm not used to having to fight for something. I usually say "Okay well I tried. Now I'll try something new." And so because of this, I seem to have acquired a lack of commitment and stability in my life. I suppose my new goal is to change this aspect of myself.

I was told to stand up for myself more.

How long can I stay committed to feeling a certain way? It's something of a challenge.


No sketches to post, only a few thoughts and requests of the world:

*Namie Amuro has had plastic surgery, this makes me very sad.
*Shakira dyed her hair blond to try and cross over into the American market.
*The internet is too demanding. Why should you care what I'm doing? why do you need to know when I eat, shower, or go to work? Girls are murdered in that way.
*I believe that the US has a good shot when the round of 16 starts tomorrow.

a request: please love the way you look naturally. maybe if the someone you want to love you doesn't, someone else always will.

When it comes to love, what everyone says matters not, what matters is what you're feeling at that very moment. So can I just use this as an opportunity to say that I still love you?

bendiçion mi gente. <3

SENIOR THESIS/ JEWISH GYPSY IN DISGUISE

Sure, I'm only entering my junior year.
BUT, I've been warned by my professors: "Only two seniors finished their thesis, start thinking about it this summer."

And so I heed their warning and I've begun to brainstorm and sketch. However, I've decided to take my thesis in a different direction than what had originally been planned. I had dreamed of some epic animated adventure as a freshman, and although the idea is flawless, the visuals beautiful, and the characters rich, I've decided to go in a less "epic direction".

I've always maintained a fascination with my family history. Its so rich and varied. My life is built upon the dreams and customs of immigrants. The family is full of stories, and secrets. This summer I am dedicating myself to tracing whatever leads I can, hopefully past Ellis Island and to back to the land of my forefathers and mothers.

TASK ONE: My maternal grandmother's history
LOCATION: Williamsburg, Bushwick, (Brooklyn), Frackville, (Pennsylvania), Ukraine, Austria

This part of my family history is one of the most, dare I say "mysterious" and frustrating. My grandmother has lived (and continues to live) a full and interesting life. I did an interview of her for one of my film classes. She rolled with knife gangs, hung out in the projects, and went dancing out in Greenpoint. She's always been quite tough and after conducting the interview last fall I started to finally believe "the stories" she used to scare us with as kids.

The mysterious part: Not only does my grandmother swear that we are gypsies (romany), she also claims we are royalty. Not really sure, however certain customs upheld by my family (pysanky, decorating hollow eggs with hot wax and vinegar dyes in order to appease the gods and protect the world from chaos) add up with such claims. Not to mention my immediate family's natural abilities ranging from palmistry to dream interpretation.

The other mysterious part: There is a family rumor that my great grandfather came to Brooklyn from Austria to avoid a rising anti-semetic feeling. He was a caretaker of a synagogue, a job mostly maintained by Jews, but my grandmother and her many brothers and sisters were raised Catholic.

Goal: Find out if we really are Jewish Gypsies in disguise.


What in the hell does this have to do with my thesis?
Researching the lives of immigrants in the early twentieth century will help me understand my subject matter, which at the moment I am leaning towards doing a piece on immigration through Ellis Island.

Starting this week I will be going on little quests throughout Brooklyn to document significant locations in my family history. Look forward to this blog being updated more often.

lack of sleep and ambition.

Last night I laid awake in my bed until 5am. I then fell asleep for two hours, only to wake up and see two people leave my room. And then I woke up again at 8am. I went back to sleep...I woke up again at 8:30 after dreaming that my seven year old sister tried to jump off of the roof of some large factory building in Stroudsburg. In the dream, my eighteen year old brother grabbed her before she fell completely. Not to mention the other nightmares I had last night.  I hate sleeping alone. This is just another night for me. I'm still a little shaken up after the dream about my little sister. Sometimes I wonder if I should go see a shrink about all of these nightmares, because I feel as though they are compensating for some terrible event from my childhood that I am suppressing. I have not had a normal night of sleep since I was probably eight years old. I've always slept-walk or had night terrors; save for the nights I sleep in James' bed. I still have nightmares when I'm there too, but when I wake up I am reminded that they're just bad dreams. I wake up crying a lot, with marks on my palms from clenching my fists. I'm starting to sound emo, so I'm going to stop. Look at me whining about not sleeping...I go to Pratt. 

On a lighter note, spring break begins technically tomorrow night. I'm on duty monday night (I am an RA at my school) and so I've just decided not to go home. I have finals to think about it (even though my last two midterms are due tomorrow) and that is the life of an animation major. You are always working. You are always thinking about work. You dream about your work. You live in your work and watch cartoons when you should really be thinking about more adult type things. I dreamt of my senior thesis last year. I decided as soon as I woke up that that would be the short film I would animate for senior thesis. Most likely I'll be doing it in stop motion, because who the fuck cares. Its my thesis. I'm a 2-D traditional animator, I work with pencil on paper and flash. I'm best at stop motion  work, and if I can become great at it, then I will pursue it to the best of my ability. Its a niche market, so there are two options: be a genius and make tons of money, OR, don't do it. 

When I was a child, I used to go to the Banc of America (in the 90's their corporate HQ in midtown was spelled BANC and I used to ask my father about it all the time) with my father who worked in their quality assurance department (i.e. testing the network for bugs and holes). I'd sit at an empty cubicle and read the paper, make magazines, spread sheets, I owned a few dollars of stock. 

When I was ten, I ran and distributed two class room magazines independent of my school. Each bimonthly magazine sold for twenty five cents and I sold yearly subscriptions for a dollar or some type of candy. I paid my employees ten cents a week. Also at that time, I collaborated with a nine year old boy to create a line of homemade perfumes that we sold for a dollar each at recess. I also did custom illustrations for people in my class for up to 5 dollars a drawing depending on the size. 

I used to buy those aliens for twenty five cents at those machines and sell them for 85 cents. I made quite a large profit by branding the aliens, creating a language and a collectors book for them. 

I never needed money in elementary school.

I took a forensic science class one summer because I felt like it. 

I go to art school now. I need a calculator for everything. 

fail

Me and Brendan are as of now racing each other to see who can create the prettiest blog. 

My name is Ashley and I am some type of artist. That is more than I care for anyone to know. However, if you know me then you may have other words to describe me as. For example, words like "hot", "talented", and "puppy" come to mind when I say my own name. What do you think of when you say your name? Do you even think at all? 

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and not know where you are? Or if you are even awake? 

I've slept-walked many places in and around where I have lived and currently live. I have no recollection of any adventures I may have had, or any perils. I shouldn't specify that I may have been in peril, because what is peril but a component of a seaworthy adventure?

Can I stop typing like an elitist hipster now? Or is it elitist to even suggest that I am writing in such a way?

My brain has just 'sploded. SMH